Tuesday, July 31, 2012

The New and Improved 30 Before 30

After spending a good bit of time thinking about what I want to get out of my 30 Before 30 list, I am ready to make a few final changes. The whole point in creating this list was to make turning 30 years old less daunting, while also accomplishing things that I've always wanted to do. I previously mentioned that a change in perspective (due to becoming a mother) has made me question The List. 

I've been asking myself if certain things must be accomplished before I turn 30 years old, how will these items impact my family, and am I being selfish in wanting these things. To answer, yes, I need to make some adjustments to items that aren't kid friendly. Yes, a couple of items fall under the "life list" instead of the Before 30 list. And the selfish part? I do feel a little guilty for still wanting to accomplish these things, but I've realized that they are necessary in order to prevent the loss of myself. My world revolves around Gavin (as it should), but it's okay to have some "me time", too.

The items I've decided that need to be replaced are:

11. Visit the Grand Canyon
16. Visit at least one sponsor child 
17. Spend the day with beluga whales
26. Visit at least 5 museums
30. Get accepted to law school

Now, let me explain...

#11 - Visit the Grand Canyon. This is something that I definitely want to see in my lifetime, but I also want Gavin to be able to see it and remember seeing it. This needs to be a family trip when Gav is old enough to appreciate the sights, and this will not be before I turn 30 as Gav will only be 3 years old.

#16 - Visit at least one sponsor child. Currently, Keith and I sponsor 4 children through Compassion. Wilkemberg lives in Brazil, Luz in Columbia, Michael in Bangladesh, and Ester in Tanzania. I adore these children with all of my heart and want to meet each of them. However, I called Compassion to inquire about bringing Gavin with us and they told me he needs to be at least 12 years old. He's not even a year old yet. I can't imagine traveling out of the USA for weeks at a time without Gavin, so I'm removing this from the list. If something changes and I am able to meet my sweet sponsor kids soon, then fantastic. It just won't be on the 30 Before 30 list. 

#17 - Spend the day with beluga whales. This would be really cool to do one day, but I'm going to remove it from the list as it isn't something that I consider a worthwhile need-to-do-before-30 item. So off it goes.

#26 - Visit at least 5 museums. I love museums and want to visit as many as possible in my lifetime, but having to commit to visiting 5 with an infant and eventually a toddler will be quite complicated (and basically asking for chaos). So, instead of dreading #26, I've decided to remove it.

#30 - Get accepted to law school. This is one that needs more than a few lines of explaining, but for now I'll just say that my new perspective has made me question the timing of law school right now for my family. In June I attempted to study for the LSAT, but I just didn't have the time. And if I don't have the time for the LSAT, I won't have the time for law school. This decision is very important to me, and I'll be writing later with more of my thoughts.

So, those are the items that are being removed. I'm happy that some are going and a bit sad about the others. But, it's for the best and I'm excited about the 5 that I'm adding. 

The new #11 - Take an aerial skills class. This new item is a fun one and not extremely time consuming, so it's perfect for my schedule. I've always wanted to take a trapeze class (that's on the life list), but I think that this will be a nice alternative on my 30 Before 30. I can take this class here in Charleston and I'm excited to learn how to be an aerial acrobat. :)

The new #16 -Have breakfast at Tiffany's. Oh, Audrey. Is there anyone who exudes grace and poise like she does? Doubtful. Breakfast at Tiffany's is one of my favorite Audrey movies (right behind Roman Holiday and Sabrina) and I would love to spend a morning strolling NYC with my two favorite guys and have breakfast Tiffany's.

The new #17 - Start our adoption paperwork. This new item is truly the most dear to my heart. Keith and I have always had the desire to expand our family by having children and also adopting children, and I am anxiously waiting the moment that we begin the adoption process. To me, this isn't just an item on my 30 Before 30...this is the chance to change a child's life, and for our life to be changed in return. To love them and protect them and teach them about God. My greatest accomplishment in this life has been becoming a mother, and I can't wait to expand our brood. We desire to adopt internationally and know the process is a long one, so Keith and I have both agreed to begin the process before January 2016. AH! :D

The new #26 - Get published (even if it's self-published). If you guys only knew all of the ideas I have roaming around in this head of mine. I am itching to write my first novel, but I just have to get over the fear that it won't be good enough, and more importantly, that it's already been done. I've never particularly dreamed of having a book published, but if what I write does get publish then I would be thrilled. Mostly though, I'm writing for me, because I have to get it out! 

The new #30 - Further my education. Instead of focusing on getting accepted to law school, I'd like to weigh my options and see what is best for my family. Do I still feel called to fight injustices? Absolutely! I have already been provisionally accepted to a local Criminal Justice Graduate Program (YAY!) and could begin taking courses online and on-campus as soon as January 2013. I will be meeting with an academic advisor soon and will make a decision shortly after. All I know is that it's been a long, hard road for me to earn my bachelor's, and now that I'm almost there, I don't want to stop.

The New 30 Before 30 List

1. Ride in a hot air balloon
2. Fly a plane
3. Learn to speak Italian
4. Go sailing/learn to sail
5. Graduate from college
6. Go to Italy!!!
7. Pay off debt (excluding student loans)
8. Run a marathon
9. Read the whole Bible
10. Go on a mission trip
11. Take an aerial skills class
12. Meet my weight loss goal
13. Learn to play the piano
14. Go skydiving
15. Learn to play tennis
16. Have breakfast at Tiffany's
17. Start our adoption paperwork

18. Take a dance class
19. Learn to surf  (again)
20. Go snowboarding or skiing
21. Go to a Hillsong concert
22. Go horseback riding
23. Walk the Brooklyn Bridge
24. Attend a Yankee game in NYC
25. Volunteer regularly at a nursing home
26. Get published (even if it's self-published)
27. Go on a cruise
28. Learn how to shoot a gun properly
29. Do an anonymous pay it forward
30. Further my education

There you have it -- my new complete, final 30 Before 30 List! Do you have a bucket list? If so, please send me your link! I'd love to follow your journey.


Lauren said...

this list looks great! While I certainly think it's awesome to make goals, I also think that great goals are ones that can be adaptable to your life & te circumstances you find yourself in...so kudos to you for being flexible in your goal-making!

Chelsie said...

Very cool! I know that we have adopted domestically but if you ever have any questions about it in general I would be happy to help. :)

Mrs. B said...

Hello! I've never commented on your blog before. I noticed it because you mentioned an interest in going to law school, and have looked in from time to time. I just wanted to say that I think your decision to re-evaluate law school is a very solid one. I started trying for our first baby the year before I applied for law school. By the grace of God (seriously), I didn't become pregnant till the end of my first year. I now know that there is absolutely no way I ever would have finished school, or even started it, if I had had a baby before I began. It's just too hard. My first year of law school was brutally hard. I barely slept, I barely talked to my husband, it was just all study all the time. I had always assumed I'd do part-time if I had a baby, but I never realized that the part-time students only take ONE less class than the full-time students at my school. I don't think I could have dealt with being so absent from my child. I go part-time now, and it's still 50+ hours a week of work. Thankfully, I do most of it while my daughter sleeps but it's still very hard. Anyways, I just wanted to add some confirmation to your decision. Good luck with everything!

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